the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
