so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The Olympian is in my bed
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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