Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
