Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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