If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
This house was built for laser tag.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
My life is pants optional.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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