Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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