youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
