We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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