We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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