The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
