Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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