dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
