I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
