its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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