My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
