i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Randomize