It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
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