i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
it's like iHOP with fire
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I still have a little drunk in my system
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
