I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
