i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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