i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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