just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Less talking, more tequila
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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