i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
