at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
