Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
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