Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
zippers are such a cool invention
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize