Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
