..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
whose ass print is on the piano?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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