No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
