I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
