I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
