Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry BDOGG503 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(206): View more from Washington

Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.

Fav 14 4554 922
share tweet
(360): View more from Washington

Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!

Fav 34 6985 847
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(715): View more from Wisconsin

I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.

Fav 8 1496 3836
share tweet
(806): View more from Texas

You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.

Fav 48 2567 3599
share tweet
(469): View more from Texas

I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.

Fav 33 6397 1367
share tweet
(712): View more from Iowa

I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.

Fav 8 1168 2966
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(812): View more from Indiana

Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.

Fav 9 1984 769
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(712): View more from Iowa

Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.

(712): View more from Iowa

With a fannypack full of drugs.

Fav 4 1142 566
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(413): View more from Massachusetts

Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?

Fav 0 46 7
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT