It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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