margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
It was confusing and full of hummus
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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