You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
tell me about the eggs
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
