Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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