He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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