I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
