I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
