he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
