You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
