Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
