Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
