Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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