Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
