he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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