she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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