Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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