sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You made out with two different species that night
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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