i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
